Come Get Your Kids on Humanizing Dogs.

People love dogs. They're without a doubt man's best friend (unless you're a pussy and/or allergic).  Many people consider their dogs to be a member of the family and treat them as such for the remainder of their short lives.  The focus of today is understanding why white people do strange things to their dogs.

Ok, I get it...your baby is fat and you've got a cute Shar-pei puppy, but c'mon son.  On the day this picture was taken, a seed was planted and the child's life has changed forever. Here's to future eating disorders and mommy issues. (OWNERS ARE WHITE)

.......If this picture was taken on a day other than Halloween, then go kill yourself 5 times. (OWNER IS WHITE)

Sure, this is funny. But why???  Where and how did they acquire a bikini bottom small enough to put on a dog and large enough to cover its' butt hole?  Sickos (OWNERS HAVE TO BE WHITE)

Probably the stupidest thing I've ever seen in my life.  She probably spent a grip too.  (OWNER IS WHITE, EVEN IF I CAN'T SEE HER SKIN, I CAN RECOGNIZE WHITE THIGHS FROM UNDER ANY FABRIC, AND SKETCHERS ARE JUST AS DEAD GIVEAWAY)

The caption says it all folks, this is quite possibly the loneliest picture I've ever seen in my life.  Notice how there is nothing on the deck or the backyard.  This person literarlly has nothing better to do than humiliate their pooch. (ANYONE THAT OWNS A GOLDEN RETRIEVER IS WHITE BY DEFAULT)

I hope you've all learned a thing or two about how white people treat their dogs.  And I'm not saying all white people do this, but its takes a certain kind of white person to dress their dog up as if it were a human.  It's one thing if it's a child messing around because they don't know any better, but its something else when a grown ass adult does it because they think it's funny.  Caesar Milan would be oh-so disappointed with the owners of these dogs.  A dog is meant to be a dog, not a dress up toy.  Remember whites; not only are you embarrassing your dog, you are also destroying the perceptions of those who are close to you (i.e your children) on how to treat animals.   

Come Get Your Kids

before they

Come Get Your Dogs

Kids: Larger Than....A Lot of Stuff

Child Obesity is no joke.  As a disclaimer let me just say if you or your child are fat because of a medical reason I apologize in advance.... unless that medical reason is you like to eat and  don't know anything about nutrition.

First I'd like to thank The Maury Show...

Maury, you've exploited and dissected the lives of countless  fat children and for that we thank you.

If this ain't the laziest shit I've ever seen, she's like 9...

Labels out!!!!

I thought eating a lot of rice doesn't make you fat

SN: Peep my "Smoking is for Kids?" post...what is it with Asians and piggypack rides?? I want one...a piggyback ride, not an Asian.

Sorry baby boy, but that plane isn't going anywhere.

New Flash fatkids and parents of fat kids:  If you don't change your eating habits, this could be your future.  Not only is he large he also is obviously going through some sort of identity crisis.  I wonder how long he thought about the black lipstick before slapping it on....oh well. 

It's quite obvious that these children could have spent a bit more time outdoors moving around and being active.  The lack of vitamin D (aka sunlight) is literally written all over their faces...all of them--even the Asian and the Mickie D's twins--are pasty AF

I encourage you to eat less and go outside more

Strive For More

and

Come Get Your Kids

Come Get Your Kids on Teen Parenting

  "Let's all get pregnant, pull our shirts up, and then take a picture by the stairs, AND THEN put it on facebook. We're going to get so many likes! YEAAA!!!!!"

I blame MTV.

It starts out with a couple of hoodrats posing in front of the steps at their parents house. Next thing you know you just got done changing your kids' diaper and *FLASH*, time for a risque photo shoot with the girls.

How they managed to coordinate those outfits is beyond me.

"Smile Johnny! He's going to be your new daddy!"

 The picture quality isn't all that clear, but this Mom's buns seem to have been pounded for so long her cheeks have literally deflated....I think its time to quit sending pictures to horny men who just want to jiz in your eye...just a thought,.

To the young women out there: I encourage you to do better and strive for more and set bigger goals for yourself. You have a long time before you need to get preggo (and Im not talking about spaghetti sauce).

Think with your head not your privates. 

If you leave your education at the doorstep for poopy diapers and Tickle-Me-Elmos, this could be your future

Come Get Your Kids before you're taking care of theirs!

Why You Mad?

I always wondered what white kids have to be angry about...

My mom used to bribe me with chocolate milk to give people the finger for her while she was driving.  I was 5. smh. This little futbol fan can't possibly know why he's giving the finger. Chances are his parents thought it was hilarious. But if you can afford soccer tickets and that fresh ass jersey, yo ass isn't allowed to be angry at shit...especially when you can't even form compound sentences. 

Why the long face little man?  Things could be a lot worse for you. You're parents could be treating you like snake food.

Awwww isn't the King Cobra so cute? Look, they're hugging.

Someone along the way told the parents of this child that snakes were harmless.  Newsflash: they aren't.  Kids, come get your parents.

SMMFH

STRIVE FOR MORE, DO BETTER

Factory Made Wangstas From Around The Way

Today we will be discussing swagless white boys...All pictures used today come straight from my personal White Boy Archives. Dear white boys, we are living in a time and age where all of y'all are on the downfall. The throne is no longer yours...your reign of power is finally over.  And for good reason.  My words will mean nothing today and the pictures will do most of the talking. Join me as I exploit and slander the most unauthentic human beings around the way.....

This is a rare sighting, two men in Jorts!

Times are rough for Po' Little Tink Tink

This one moved around way too much and was sweating for no reason. But God bless his crazy self, Lord knows he need a prayer. #struggle

The last picture is my least favorite type of white boy, compliments of @JumpOff_JG

If you see 3 white buls in white Tees, jorts and no black friends you need to just keep it movin' cause 9 times outta 10 they're up to no good for no good reason. SN: There is a strange connection with white boys and Jorts....one day I'll get to the bottom of it.

Keep your eyes peeled because these people are roaming these streets.  But shout out to you if your a white boy who just keeps it all the way real with themselves.  You are a rare breed amongst the factory made wangstas from around the way.

Strive For More

Teach Your Kids Culture

Smoking is for Kids?

Smoking....quite a disgusting habit. And even more disgusting when trashy little white girls do it in their struggle pools. Sorry if that offends you but I don't care. People have their own reasons for smoking cigarettes, whatever. Some irresponsible parents take pictures of their sleeping infant, and plant cigarettes and beer cans on their innocent child to send grama and grampa a "hilarious" picture message.  Just remember, most of those babies are white as well as their parents. 

That ain't funny b.

Further on in my venture to find signs of corruption and shame, I found multiple pictures of young Asian children smoking on their own.....no help from mommy or daddy...

Homie up top look happy as shit.  Sitting there on his little scoot-around-Fred Flinstone-mobile like he's got a funny story tell, (probably something to do with cupcakes).

This young man displays a great demonstration of multi-tasking...he's got talent so I'll give him a pass...if you have to carry around a child on your back and you're a child yourself,  you just might deserve a cigarette... but don't let him light it, kids shouldn't use matches.

Man, this little dude....forget the cigarette, where the fuck did his hair line go? He looks like all types of struggle. 

In conclusion, smoking at such a tender age betters a child's chances of growing up to become a non-winner. Save their lungs for a time when they've really started to hate their lives.... It happens to everyone, trust me. I mean... take Brittany for example.

..At least the cigarette is pointed away from her son, and she's got a full head of hair.

Things could be worse, I'll let her live.

Smoke Responsibly and Always Strive For More.

Today's post is brought to you by, Grinding.  Something we've all done at one point or another...way before picture phones and affordable digital cameras were so easily accessible.  Never forget the good times of shaking your bom-bom on a semi-lub-one looking like a diamond amongst butterflies.  This should bring back those shameful days.

"feel a little poke coming through, on you"

Nowadays you can't conceal such sexuality, because everyone's a detective.  Picture phones, Instagram, Flikr, and other image hosting sites have made it easy for people to share ignorance from every corner of the world.  Even the young kids are learning how to drop it low girl drop it drop it low girl.  TV really spoils young minds.

I joke about the above picture however it really is a problem, but that's for another time, another blog, another venture in life.  But I urge all you parents out there to challenge yourself and DO BETTER

Unless of course your parents are these people....

"OH! OH! OH! OH, HONEY! OH!"

Classic O-face sir, classic.

Do Better. Strive For More